Learn Chinese: Accepting and Refusing Polite Requests
Master how to respond appropriately to polite requests in Mandarin Chinese, with key phrases for accepting and refusing, plus cultural tips.
By TheaFirst conversations · Yapr Learn
When someone asks you for help in Chinese, knowing how to respond politely is essential. This lesson focuses on the responses you can give to requests like 'Could you help me?' You will learn simple phrases to accept enthusiastically, to refuse politely, and to ask for clarification. We will also cover the difference between direct and indirect refusals, and how to use '可以' (kěyǐ) and '不行' (bùxíng) appropriately. By the end, you will be able to handle common polite requests in everyday situations.
By the end, you can…
- accept a polite request using phrases like '当然可以' and '没问题'.
- politely refuse a request using '对不起，我不能' or '不好意思，我有事'.
- ask for clarification if I don't understand the request.
Listen once. Try it slowly. Then say it without looking.
Checking available voices…
当然可以。
Of course.
dāngrán kěyǐ.
A warm, enthusiastic acceptance. Use when you are happy to help.
没问题。
No problem.
méi wèntí.
Casual and friendly. Suitable for friends or colleagues.
对不起，我不能。
Sorry, I can't.
duìbuqǐ, wǒ bù néng.
A direct but polite refusal. Use when you are unable to help.
不好意思，我有事。
Sorry, I have something to do.
bù hǎoyìsi, wǒ yǒu shì.
A softer refusal, implying you are busy. Common in casual situations.
你说什么？
What did you say?
nǐ shuō shénme?
Use when you didn't hear or understand the request and need repetition.
Pronunciation guides are approximate. Slow playback keeps the original pitch.
Make it make sense
Useful pattern
To accept a request, you can use '可以' (kěyǐ) or '行' (xíng) to mean 'can' or 'okay'. For example, '可以，我帮你。' (Kěyǐ, wǒ bāng nǐ.) means 'Sure, I'll help you.' To refuse, use '不能' (bù néng) or '不行' (bù xíng) for 'cannot', often preceded by an apology like '对不起' (duìbuqǐ) or '不好意思' (bù hǎoyìsi). For instance, '对不起，我不能帮你。' (Duìbuqǐ, wǒ bù néng bāng nǐ.) means 'Sorry, I can't help you.' Another pattern is to give a reason: '我有事' (wǒ yǒu shì) means 'I have things to do'.
When to use it
Use enthusiastic acceptances like '当然可以' with friends, family, or close colleagues. For more formal situations, such as with a boss or stranger, use '好的，没问题' (Hǎo de, méi wèntí) meaning 'Okay, no problem.' When refusing, always soften with an apology. Direct refusals like '不行' (bù xíng) can sound rude if not preceded by an apology. In Chinese culture, it's common to give a brief reason for refusal to show respect. For example, '不好意思，我现在很忙。' (Bù hǎoyìsi, wǒ xiànzài hěn máng.) means 'Sorry, I'm very busy right now.'
Listen to each line, then take one part and reply out loud.
你能帮我一下吗？
Can you help me?nǐ néng bāng wǒ yīxià ma?当然可以。什么事？
Of course. What is it?dāngrán kěyǐ. shénme shì?请你帮我拿一下书。
Please help me get the book.qǐng nǐ bāng wǒ ná yīxià shū.没问题。
No problem.méi wèntí.A little context goes a long way
In Chinese culture, refusing a request directly can be seen as impolite. It's common to use indirect refusals, such as '我考虑一下' (wǒ kǎolǜ yīxià, 'I'll think about it') or '可能不行' (kěnéng bù xíng, 'possibly not'), to save face. When accepting, enthusiasm is appreciated, but overpromising is avoided. Also, using '您' (nín) instead of '你' (nǐ) shows respect to elders or superiors.
One thing to watch for
Using '不行' (bù xíng) alone as a refusal, which can sound harsh.
Try this instead: Always soften with an apology or reason. For example, say '对不起，不行' (duìbuqǐ, bù xíng) or '不好意思，我有事' (bù hǎoyìsi, wǒ yǒu shì).
Your turn
Try answering out loud before checking a possible answer.
1How would you politely accept a request to help someone?
Show a sample answer
当然可以。
This is a warm and polite acceptance. You could also say '没问题' or '好的'.
2What is a polite way to refuse a request because you are busy?
Show a sample answer
不好意思，我有事。
This softens the refusal with an apology and a reason. '对不起，我很忙' is also acceptable.
3If you didn't understand the request, what could you say?
Show a sample answer
你说什么？
This asks for repetition. You could also say '请再说一遍' (qǐng zài shuō yī biàn).
Remember to accept with enthusiasm and refuse with politeness. Adding an apology or reason makes your refusal more acceptable in Chinese culture.
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