Mandarin Chinese: Expressing Deep Regret and Making Amends (对不起 vs. 后悔)
Learn to express sincere regret for bigger things in Mandarin Chinese, using 后悔 (hòuhuǐ) and 对不起 (duìbuqǐ) to apologize and make amends beyond simple mistakes.
By PookieFriends & plans · Yapr Learn
In Mandarin Chinese, apologizing for a small mistake like bumping into someone is different from expressing deep regret for a serious action that hurt someone. This lesson teaches you how to say 'I regret not telling you' and how to make amends using 后悔 (hòuhuǐ) and 对不起 (duìbuqǐ). You will learn to distinguish between a quick apology and a heartfelt expression of remorse, and how to offer concrete amends. We focus on intermediate-level patterns that sound natural and sincere in Mandarin.
By the end, you can…
- express deep regret using 后悔 (hòuhuǐ) for past actions.
- apologize sincerely and offer to make amends using 对不起 (duìbuqǐ) and 弥补 (míbǔ).
Listen once. Try it slowly. Then say it without looking.
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对不起，我后悔没有告诉你。
I'm sorry, I regret not telling you.
Duìbuqǐ, wǒ hòuhuǐ méiyǒu gàosu nǐ.
Use when you failed to share important information and now feel deep regret. 对不起 opens the apology; 后悔 states the regret.
我真的很后悔。
I really regret it.
Wǒ zhēn de hěn hòuhuǐ.
Emphasizes the depth of your regret. 真的 (zhēn de) and 很 (hěn) intensify the feeling.
我想弥补我的过错。
I want to make amends for my mistake.
Wǒ xiǎng míbǔ wǒ de guòcuò.
Use 弥补 (míbǔ) to mean 'make up for' or 'compensate'. 过错 (guòcuò) is a formal word for 'fault' or 'mistake'.
请给我一个机会弥补。
Please give me a chance to make amends.
Qǐng gěi wǒ yí ge jīhuì míbǔ.
A polite request for forgiveness and a chance to fix things. 一个 (yí ge) is the measure word for 机会 (jīhuì, chance).
我知道道歉不够，但我会努力改正。
I know an apology isn't enough, but I will work hard to correct it.
Wǒ zhīdào dàoqiàn bú gòu, dàn wǒ huì nǔlì gǎizhèng.
Acknowledges that words alone are insufficient and promises action. 改正 (gǎizhèng) means 'correct' or 'rectify'.
Pronunciation guides are approximate. Slow playback keeps the original pitch.
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Useful pattern
To express deep regret in Mandarin, use 后悔 (hòuhuǐ) followed by the action you regret. For example, 我后悔没有告诉你 (Wǒ hòuhuǐ méiyǒu gàosu nǐ) means 'I regret not telling you.' The negative past is formed with 没有 (méiyǒu) + verb. You can also say 我后悔说了那句话 (Wǒ hòuhuǐ shuō le nà jù huà) — 'I regret saying that sentence.' Note that 后悔 is stronger than 对不起 (duìbuqǐ) alone; it focuses on your own emotional pain about a past choice.
When to use it
Use 后悔 when you are reflecting on a serious personal failing, such as not supporting a friend, hiding the truth, or breaking a promise. For everyday small mistakes like arriving late, a simple 对不起 is enough. But for bigger things, combine 对不起 with 后悔 and a concrete offer to make amends: 对不起，我后悔没有帮你。我会弥补的。 (Duìbuqǐ, wǒ hòuhuǐ méiyǒu bāng nǐ. Wǒ huì míbǔ de.) — 'I'm sorry, I regret not helping you. I will make amends.' This shows you take responsibility and intend to repair the relationship.
Listen to each line, then take one part and reply out loud.
对不起，我后悔没有告诉你真相。
I'm sorry, I regret not telling you the truth.Duìbuqǐ, wǒ hòuhuǐ méiyǒu gàosu nǐ zhēnxiàng.我知道你后悔，但我还是很伤心。
I know you regret it, but I'm still very hurt.Wǒ zhīdào nǐ hòuhuǐ, dàn wǒ háishì hěn shāngxīn.请给我一个机会弥补。我会努力改正。
Please give me a chance to make amends. I will work hard to correct it.Qǐng gěi wǒ yí ge jīhuì míbǔ. Wǒ huì nǔlì gǎizhèng.好吧，我相信你一次。
Alright, I'll trust you this once.Hǎo ba, wǒ xiāngxìn nǐ yí cì.A little context goes a long way
In Chinese culture, a sincere apology often includes acknowledging the specific harm and offering a concrete way to make amends. Saying 对不起 alone for a serious matter may seem too casual. Using 后悔 shows you personally feel the weight of your action, which is valued as a sign of genuine remorse. However, avoid over-apologizing in a way that seems performative; balance words with actions.
One thing to watch for
Using 对不起 alone for a serious betrayal, thinking it's enough.
Try this instead: For bigger things, combine 对不起 with 后悔 and an offer to make amends. For example, say 对不起，我后悔没有告诉你。我会弥补的。 (Duìbuqǐ, wǒ hòuhuǐ méiyǒu gàosu nǐ. Wǒ huì míbǔ de.) — 'I'm sorry, I regret not telling you. I will make amends.' This shows deeper sincerity.
Your turn
Try answering out loud before checking a possible answer.
1How do you say 'I regret not telling you' in Mandarin?
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我后悔没有告诉你。 (Wǒ hòuhuǐ méiyǒu gàosu nǐ.)
This uses 后悔 (hòuhuǐ) for regret and 没有 (méiyǒu) for the negative past. You could also say 我后悔没告诉你 (Wǒ hòuhuǐ méi gàosu nǐ), which is slightly more colloquial.
2What phrase means 'to make amends' in Chinese?
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弥补 (míbǔ)
弥补 (míbǔ) means to compensate or make up for a fault. It is often used with 过错 (guòcuò, fault) or 机会 (jīhuì, chance), as in 弥补我的过错 (míbǔ wǒ de guòcuò).
3How would you apologize sincerely and ask for a chance to make amends?
Show a sample answer
对不起，请给我一个机会弥补。 (Duìbuqǐ, qǐng gěi wǒ yí ge jīhuì míbǔ.)
This combines 对不起 (duìbuqǐ) for apology, 请 (qǐng) for politeness, and 弥补 (míbǔ) for amends. You could also add 我真的很后悔 (Wǒ zhēn de hěn hòuhuǐ) to emphasize regret.
For serious apologies in Mandarin, go beyond 对不起: use 后悔 (hòuhuǐ) to express deep regret and 弥补 (míbǔ) to offer concrete amends. This shows sincerity and respect.
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