How to Apologize in Mandarin Chinese: 对不起, 不好意思, and 抱歉 for Everyday Mistakes
Learn the three most common Mandarin apologies for minor slip-ups like bumping into someone or being late. Master formal and informal registers, natural responses, and polite questions for staff.
By LiamCulture & nuance · Yapr Learn
If you bump into someone on a crowded subway or arrive late to meet a friend, the first Chinese words you need are 对不起 (duìbuqǐ), 不好意思 (bù hǎoyìsi), and 抱歉 (bàoqiàn). These three expressions cover almost every small mistake you will make as a beginner. This lesson shows you exactly when to use each one, how to respond when someone apologizes to you, and how to ask staff for help politely. You will practice a short realistic exchange and answer questions that check your understanding of register and grammar. By the end, you will be able to apologize naturally without sounding either too stiff or too casual.
By the end, you can…
- apologize for minor mistakes using 对不起, 不好意思, and 抱歉.
- respond appropriately when someone apologizes to me.
Listen once. Try it slowly. Then say it without looking.
Checking available voices…
对不起。
Sorry.
duìbuqǐ
The most standard apology. Use when you have clearly caused inconvenience, such as stepping on someone's foot or arriving late. It is sincere and works in both formal and informal situations.
不好意思。
Excuse me; sorry.
bù hǎoyìsi
Lighter and more casual than 对不起. Use for small disruptions like squeezing past someone, interrupting, or asking a stranger for directions. It also works as a soft 'excuse me'.
抱歉。
I apologize; my apologies.
bàoqiàn
Slightly more formal or written in flavor. Common in service settings and among colleagues. It can sound a bit distant with close friends, where 不好意思 is warmer.
没关系。
It's okay; no problem.
méi guānxi
The most common response to an apology. Use it to reassure someone that the mistake was minor. It is neutral and safe in almost any context.
请问一下。
Excuse me, may I ask?
qǐngwèn yīxià
A polite way to get a staff member's attention before asking a question. It literally means 'please ask a bit'. Pair it with 不好意思 for extra politeness.
Pronunciation guides are approximate. Slow playback keeps the original pitch.
Make it make sense
Useful pattern
The core pattern is simply the apology word plus an optional reason. For example, 对不起，我迟到了。 (duìbuqǐ, wǒ chídào le.) means 'Sorry, I'm late.' 不好意思，我踩到你了。 (bù hǎoyìsi, wǒ cǎi dào nǐ le.) means 'Sorry, I stepped on you.' 抱歉，让你久等了。 (bàoqiàn, ràng nǐ jiǔ děng le.) means 'My apologies for making you wait so long.' Notice that Chinese does not require a subject like 'I' before the apology. The apology word itself carries the function. You can also add 真的 (zhēn de, really) for emphasis: 真的对不起。 (zhēn de duìbuqǐ.) 'I'm really sorry.'
When to use it
Choose your apology by the size of the mistake and your relationship. 对不起 is the safest all-purpose choice, especially with strangers, elders, or in formal settings. 不好意思 is best for tiny accidents, interrupting, or getting attention; it feels lighter and more casual. 抱歉 is common in workplaces and service encounters, but it can sound a little formal among close friends. If someone apologizes to you, 没关系 is the standard reply. You can also say 没事 (méi shì, it's nothing) or 不要紧 (bù yàojǐn, it doesn't matter). Avoid using 对不起 for very trivial things like asking for the time; 不好意思 fits better there.
Listen to each line, then take one part and reply out loud.
不好意思，我踩到你的脚了。
Sorry, I stepped on your foot.bù hǎoyìsi, wǒ cǎi dào nǐ de jiǎo le.没关系，不疼。
It's okay, it doesn't hurt.méi guānxi, bù téng.对不起，我迟到了。
Sorry, I'm late.duìbuqǐ, wǒ chídào le.没事，我也刚到。
No problem, I just arrived too.méi shì, wǒ yě gāng dào.A little context goes a long way
In mainland China, 不好意思 is extremely common in daily life and often replaces 对不起 for minor inconveniences. Using 对不起 too often for tiny things can sound overly serious. In Taiwan and some southern regions, 不好意思 is equally frequent. When speaking to staff, start with 请问一下 or 不好意思 to signal politeness before asking your question. There is no need to bow; a slight nod and a soft tone are enough.
One thing to watch for
Using 对不起 for every small thing, such as asking a stranger for directions or squeezing past someone.
Try this instead: For tiny disruptions, 不好意思 is more natural. Example: 不好意思，请问地铁站怎么走？ (bù hǎoyìsi, qǐngwèn dìtiě zhàn zěnme zǒu?) 'Excuse me, how do I get to the subway station?' 对不起 would sound too heavy here.
Your turn
Try answering out loud before checking a possible answer.
1You accidentally bump into a stranger on the bus. Which apology is most natural?
Show a sample answer
不好意思。
不好意思 is the lightest and most common choice for small physical accidents with strangers. 对不起 is also acceptable and sincere, but it can sound a bit more serious. 抱歉 is possible but slightly formal for this situation.
2A colleague apologizes to you for a minor mistake. What can you say?
Show a sample answer
没关系。
没关系 is the standard neutral response. 没事 or 不要紧 also work well. All three reassure the person that the mistake is not a problem.
3How do you say 'Sorry, I'm late' using the most standard apology?
Show a sample answer
对不起，我迟到了。
对不起 is the standard apology for being late. You could also say 抱歉，我迟到了。 or 不好意思，我迟到了。 The choice depends on how formal you want to be; all are grammatically correct.
For minor mistakes, remember 不好意思 for small bumps and interruptions, 对不起 for a sincere standard apology, and 抱歉 for a slightly formal tone. Respond with 没关系 to put people at ease. Start with 请问一下 to politely get a staff member's attention.
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